Sunday, 24 January 2016

My Sunday Photo #2 {24.01.2016}

Before having Fred we used to waste our Sunday's hungover in bed. Having a baby has made us make the most of every day. Now Freddie is walking I feel like a proper mum, walking to the park! He loves walking and kept stopping to do his excited hands. He is going to be an outdoors adventurer for sure! It was hard to choose a picture from today's outing around our village. But look how happy he is to be walking here! Happy Sunday everyone!

Tuesday, 19 January 2016

Toddler routine

Whenever I meet other mums 'Routine' is always a topic conversation that comes up. I have found reading routines on other blogs really helpful as Freddie has gone from baby to toddler and it's great to see what other toddlers day's look like.  So, I thought it would be good to share our daily routine.

As soon as we came home from hospital with our new baby we followed an evening routine of bath, stories etc but we never really pushed a day time routine. We followed Freddie's lead and encouraged him into certain habits and I am so glad we did.  It also means he is so adaptable if his routine has to change, it means we are not beholden to a certain nap/lunch time which makes going out so easy. That said, we keep our day fairly structured when we are at home.

8/8:30am - Freddie is not an early riser, never has been so he wakes around 8, has a nappy change and drinks 8 ounces of cows milk whilst coming round to Cbeebies.

8:45/9am - Breakfast - throws Porridge and fruit on to the floor

9:15 am - Get Freddie dressed, teeth brushed etc and I dress/hair/makeup while Freddie spreads my
make up all over the bedroom.

10am - Mondays and Tuesday the routine is earlier by 15 minutes and by 10am we are at toddler group/musical bumps.  If we are at home I set Freddie up with some toys while I do housework for an hour, but in reality he doesn't play. He just follows me and undoes any tidying I'm doing/pulls things out of cupboards etc!

11/11:30am - (back from groups) We have quiet time, watch Mr Tumble and read stories, Fred drinks his drink and has a fruit snack, cuddles big cat and generally just chills on the sofa like a tiny teenager. 

12:00pm - Lunch time!

12:30pm - Nap time

2:30pm - Wakes up from his nap, usually grumpy so we have drinks, new nappy, snack and cuddles while he comes round.  While he is asleep I usually set up an afternoon activity to do together, Messy Play, Painting, Sensory bath, or his train tracks or we go out to the park. Hopefully we will be spending lots more time outdoors soon as we head into spring!

3:45pm- Milk and snack

4:00pm -  Plays with toys/shouts at me from gate on kitchen door while I prep dinner.  Once dinner is cooking we have some quiet time with cbeebies and puzzles/books while preps dinner.

5pm - Dinner

5:45pm - Tidy up time. We put his toys away together, even if he wants to pull things out I am quite strict that its 'bye bye' toys and we sing the tidy up song we have learnt through Musical bumps.  He is really starting to understand and enjoy putting is toys away so they can have 'sleeps' too. I really want him to learn to look after his things, keep them together in there right place, this means getting toys out the following day is nice and easy and we never have missing pieces! (ocd mumma alert)

6:15pm Bath - Freddie has a bath every night, we are lucky it doesn't affect his skin and he absolutely loves his bath time with daddy when he comes in from work.

6:30pm - We keep his bath to 15 minutes so as to not make him over excited or over tired. Then its into his bedroom for milk, story, massage, teeth, pj's and cuddles then into bed with Big Cat and Ewan the dream sheep and when he is in good sleep mode is always asleep by half 7. Alternatively he stays up until 11pm screaming the house down.

So that is Freddie's routine.  I absolutely love that he instigates his quiet time. He loves to be excitable, running around, playing silly games etc but he loves to cuddle and chill too and I just find it so cute!

What was your child's routine like at 14 months old? Do you keep a strict routine or are you more 'go with the flow'?

Sunday, 17 January 2016

My Sunday Photo #1 {17.01.2016}

So we are joining in with our first My Sunday Photo!

This week daddy has been working so much, we have hardly seen him! But today we had him all to ourselves all day so I thought it would be lovely to share my favourite photo of my two boys, a little throwback to our Autumn photoshoot. The bond they have is so strong and watching them play Duplo together before bedtime filled my heart with so much happiness. We love you Daddy and appreciate so much how hard you work for us!

Friday, 15 January 2016

Wedding Series #1 - An overview

Holy shit i'm getting married in 6 months. 12th August 2016 will see me become a wife.

So with that said I thought it would be really nice to start documenting the wedding preparations. You spend months planning, spend lots of money and then boom its over in a flash so it will be great to have something to look back on.

When we got engaged I didn't really have much desire to actually get married.sounds strange, but after buying our house and having a baby within a year of each other I wanted to take it slowly. but with each "have you set a date" question that was thrown at us, I started to get wedding fever.

We started looking at venues with 2017 in our minds, time to save, the more sensible option but of course us being us we ended up booking with less than a year to go until the big day!

Our venue is a beautiful country estate in our local town of Tunbridge Wells. with sprawling grounds, beautiful views and a range of stunning rooms exclusively for us we couldn't have picked a more beautiful setting.  We never thought it would be in our price range so were shocked when it came well within budget. personally I think they are selling themselves short! from the get go, we knew we wanted a summer wedding and we will be getting married outside. even if its raining!

Freddie checking out the view.  We will marry under the balcony at the top of the stairs.
I knew straight away I wanted a cool, relaxed, festival-esque style of day, and that's exactly what we are having. We have chosen corals and blues as our theme, something a bit different and so beautiful all together.  I was really unsure what colours to go for and kept changing my mind, the bridesmaid dresses gave me corals and pinks but the florist was amazing and showed me what other colours would compliment and look good. If you are struggling to pick colours I would really recommend talking to a florist!

I ordered my bridesmaid dresses months ago.  I had no desire for taffeta, satin, or traditional bridesmaid dresses and I fell in love with some stunning dresses from high street store Oasis.  I bought them in July, which was a bit risky but they went in the sale for almost half price! trying to keep within budget is tricky, so I was thrilled, every little helps! I want to try and keep some secrets, so I cant wait to share them after the big day, they are so cool and so different from the norm. Plus, my bridesmaids look absolutely stunning in them! I really think high street is the way to go when looking for the perfect bridesmaid dress, just so many gorgeous choices. Highly recommend heading straight to Asos!

I really want to make sure our day is personal to us,. I have spent hours hunting down unusual favours, table decorations etc and I think our guests will be pleasantly surprised. Don't get me wrong, as much as I am loving all of the planning and ensuring everyone has a great day, I wouldn't care if I got married in a black sack at the local registry. As long as I am Mr P's wife at the end, I will be more than happy. 

There are two things that will play big parts in our wedding.  years ago, I was given a book of quotes, passages and poems about love, over the years I have folded over pages of my favourite ones, lots that now appear regularly on pinterest and some are bit more obscure and our guests can expect to see lots of them.  Our table numbers are my favourite, each table is named after a famous poet, author, movie, actor etc followed by their beautiful quotes. I cant believe years of reading them and now they will be used at my wedding, I always hoped I would find the love it described, and I have. (I know, pass the sick bucket.)

The other thing that will make an appearance is our joint love of Harry Potter.  I am a crazy potterhead (not ashamed to admit it!)  I have read the books more time's than I can count and they mean so much to me, those books have got me through some shit times in my life.  When Chris and I first got together we used to always binge watch HP, they were some of our happiest times, just chilling, getting to know each other and because my surname sounds like 'magic', so the connotations just go on.  The harry Potter details will be understated, for example I will be having a rose within my bouquet made of my favourite HP book, which  I think is just so lovely and I am particularly excited for the cake reveal!

It is also going to be a big floral affair. Our wedding flowers are just so beautiful, I absolutely love flowers, the more the better! within reason, blimey the cost of wedding flowers *faints*.

Some of my favourite pins
I still need to finish my dress plans, hire chairs, pick up a few more decorations, signs etc, Oh and I am still trying to find a wedding singer and decide on favours... BUT the suits are done, make up and hair is booked and I cannot wait to go shopping for Freddie's outfit. Oh and Hen and Stag do's are sorted! chris is off for a weekend away (gulp) and i'm off to the races! and no doubt the traditional tacky night out with willy straws and a trip to the spa.

Our plans of a fun, relaxed wedding, drinking pimms and playing croquet on the lawn are coming together and I cannot wait for our special day. to celebrate our love together and to become Mrs P.

Handmade sign for Freddie to carry down the isle. fingers crossed he cooperates!
So before I give anymore away, I thought I would share one of my favourite quotes. I made our save the dates, and decided to put a snippet of the quote on the back and I got so many lovely comments on it.  It's a popular one from the Chaos of Stars and it is just so beautiful. (I need to get my thesaurus out, i've said beautiful way too many times in this post, whoops!)

“I didn't fall in love with you. I walked into love with you, with my eyes wide open, choosing to take every step along the way. I do believe in fate and destiny, but I also believe we are only fated to do the things that we'd choose anyway. And I'd choose you; in a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, in any version of reality, I'd find you and I'd choose you”
Kiersten White,
The Chaos of Stars

Thursday, 14 January 2016

How did we get here?

Snuggled up in bed I just had to get my laptop out. I needed to write.

As I sit here I am feeling so many emotions, sitting at the surface, ready to spill out.

I feel so guilty.  Since having Freddie guilty seems to be my favourite new emotion.  I feel guilty that I let life get in the way of recording Freddie's milestones on this blog.  One minute I am writing his 6 month update and then bam, here I am with an (almost) 14 month old.  Of course I have literally thousands of photos from the last 7 months, but I still feel it isnt enough.  I want to go back and relive every day.

Do you ever look back at photos of those first few days, weeks, months and feel like you cant remember? I get these amazing 'timehop' photos of my gorgeous squishy baby, but I just cant remember.  When I look back everything is such a blur.  A blur of amazing, exhausting moments and everything inbetween.  I see photos of a girl cradling my newborn and I don't recognise her. It is me, but I am a different person now. A women. A mum. I cant remember what it was like being her anymore.

I worry that I didn't take enough photos, videos or that I didn't write enough in his baby book and then the wave of guilt comes again.  But I guess at the time I was just in survival mode. Trying to survive a baby who choked until he went blue at every feed, a baby I couldn't breastfeed like I had dreamed. I guess getting the camera out when I was crying on the floor wasn't top of my agenda and I guess beautiful newborn Instagram photos just isn't always real life.

Everyone tells you 'it goes so fast'. Well bloody hell they are'nt joking are they. The 38 weeks I was pregnant felt like 38 years but the second our bundles are born time some fucker presses fast forward and ten minutes later here I am with a toddler, still telling people I am a 'new mum' and that I have 'just' had a baby, because to me that's true.I still feel like I am looking in a pitch dark room, for an unknown object.

The thought of Freddie growing anymore brings tears to my eyes.  please don't grow any more, stay as my tiny baby forever. But that's the funny thing about motherhood isn't it, we want them to stay small, but we also want them to grow and we burst with pride as they reach the next milestone. It is such a strange experience. sadness, joy and excitement all at the same time.

At school if I made a mistake in my workbook, I would rip it out and start again.  I hate making mistakes, I like everything to be perfect.  Unfortunately, motherhood doesn't come with a perfect option, but I do sometimes wish I could 'start over'.  I would get more things right. But maybe getting it wrong was all part of it. We are learning every day together and maybe that's what keeps our bond so very tight. 

So as I come to the end of my ramblings, I want to say thank you to my darling Freddie William.  Thank you for giving me so much joy for 14 months.  You have taught me so much about myself and I cannot imagine our lives without you in it. I have grown into a mother and you have grown into a beautiful little boy.  I am so lucky to have been at home every day with you since before you were even born and I will be forever grateful for these wonderful days we share.  Some days I feel like I want to give up, parenting is too hard and I get fed up with feeling like a cleaner. I miss the days when my nails were always done, I miss my slim body and sometimes I miss the old me.  But one look from your cheeky little face, everytime you shout mama in your funny little french accent, every time you grab my hand with your chubby little fingers, I know this is exactly where I am supposed to be.  At home, with you and daddy and I know the only job for me is being the best mum I can be to you.  You make me so proud and so overwhelmingly happy even on the hardest of days and I thank you so much for that.